HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Still reeling from his brother's death, Jermaine Jackson wishes that he had died instead of the legendary King of Pop.
"He went too soon," the music icon's older brother told Matt Lauer on NBC's "Today Show." "I wish that it was me. I've always felt that I was his backbone, someone to be there for him. I was there and he was sort of like Moses. The things he couldn't say, I would say them."
In the interview broadcast from Michael's Neverland Ranch in Los Olivos, Calif., Jermaine recalled the chilling moment when a friend told him that Michael had been rushed to the hospital. Jermaine then called his mother, Katherine, who confirmed that his brother had died.
"She was crying, saying he was dead. And Matt, to hear my mother say, 'Michael is dead,' to feel and hear the tone in her voice to say her child is dead, is nothing that anyone can ever imagine," said the fellow Jackson 5 member while fighting back tears.
Jermaine said he immediately rushed to the hospital, where he tried to console his mother before spending a few final moments with his brother.
"I wanted to see Michael, and I wanted to see my brother, and seeing him lifeless and breathless was very emotional for me," he said.
"I held myself together, because I know he's very much alive in his spirit," continued Jermaine. "I kissed him on his forehead and I hugged him and I touched him and I said, 'Michael, I'll never leave you, you'll never leave me."
Jermaine said that a therapist at the hospital advised the family to have Michael's three children — Prince Michael, 12, Paris, 11, and Prince Michael II, 7 — share a final moment with their father as a means of coming to grips with the reality of his passing.
"I know it's tough, but I think it was the best thing to do," he said. "At first I was against it, but what do you say if you don't show them?"
Jermaine said he would be hurt if circulating media reports attributing his brother's death to prescription drugs proved true, "because Michael has always been a person who was against anything like that."
I'm not saying it's right, because it's not right," he said. "But in this business, the pressure, and things that you go through — you never know what people might turn to."
On Monday, the family's 79-year-old matriarch was granted temporary guardianship of Michael's three children and Jermaine said his mother is fully up to the task.
"She's capable, she's up for it," he said. "She's always with all the children, she loves laughter and the crying and all the excitement."
"She'd have someone with her to make sure she's doing the right things," added Jermaine. "My mother is the perfect person to be with them."
Jermaine said it's been painful to hear people question his brother while he was alive and now in death. Most difficult have been the repeated child molestation accusations.
"I knew he was 1,000 percent innocent," said Jermaine. "I knew. We all knew."
With the Jackson family still trying to determine the best place to lay the fallen music icon to rest, Jermaine said the obvious choice is his brother's sprawling estate near Santa Barbara.
"Look at this place," he said. "Neverland. Look at this place. I love it here because I feel him."
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